Lost.

What do I actually love? Am I bad at it, am I good at it? Do I love it, do I not? Do I not because I feel I am not good enough, or I simply do not love it as much? What is it that I love? What is it that I am good at? What is it I'm meant to do? What is it that I'm supposed to do next? Am I denying my love for it just because I'm afraid of some part of it? Or do I really not love it as much? But there is something I love more, it excites me. It's too late, too bad. What? WHAT? WHAT?

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if that makes me feel any better. At least I know what I'm supposed to do now, this year. It feels much clearer than the other options I'm actually open to (not ME opening to it, the other way round). It does.